Some 6 years or so ago I experienced what I suppose a couple of decades ago would be described as a nervous breakdown. I simply “lost it” could not function, lots of tears, aches and pains in places I did not even think I had. My family did not know what to do with me and I eventually found myself in front of the Gp looking like death and telling him that I had some disease that really was killing me. You have probably guessed I was diagnosed with depression and at that point I did not know that depression really does hurt and debilitate. Several years later I am still taking a dosage of effexor 75mg but I hate it with a vengeance. I am sure it gives me side effects that I could really do without but I am now afraid to come off it. I suffer terribly with anxiety which I call “free floating” as it can suddenly swamp me for seemingly no apparent reason. I felt quite good this morning…..went to the supermarket and came back feeling like death itself. So sorry if you feel I am exagerating but anyone who has been there will know what I mean. I have a lovely family although I am on my own now but I desperately do not want to be a burden to them. I know and I fully appreciate that there are so many who are worse off than I am but when the anxiety strikes ….. god it is so so dreadful.